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When it comes to sex, men and women tend to view things differently. Women think about it, for sure, but men are more likely to obsess over it.<\/p>\n
As a woman wading through the world of dating and relationships, this difference often comes into play when you\u2019re trying to figure out now only how to make a guy want you, but how to make him fall in love with you, and how to get him to commit.<\/p>\n
The tale usually goes like this \u2026<\/p>\n
You\u2019re dating a guy and you like him. You\u2019ve gone on a couple of dates together and you can see a future with him. He\u2019s ready to get physically intimate and you know you\u2019re not ready, but you\u2019re afraid you\u2019ll scare him off or hurt his feelings if you say \u201cno\u201d to having sex.<\/p>\n
Fortunately, you can learn how to get him to commit without compromising your own values and desires, and the first thing you need to learn is how men think.<\/p>\n
When it comes to sex, it\u2019s easy to paint men with a broad brush, but in truth, sex is often about more for a guy than simply \u201cgetting laid\u201d.<\/p>\n
As explained by Hilary Jacobs Hendel, LCSW:<\/strong><\/p>\n \u201cThe two main emotions that are most acceptable for men to display are still sexual excitement and anger. The more tender emotions including fear, sadness, love, need, and longing are still considered \u2018unmanly\u2019 to express. So it is not surprising that the tender emotions, which have to be expressed in some way, get bound to sexuality. In fact, channeling needs for comfort and soothing into sex is actually a clever compromise. After all, during sex men can unabashedly get held, stroked, kissed, hugged, and loved up all under the acceptable guise of a very manly act \u2014 that of sexual prowess.\u201d<\/p>\n Sure, men want to have sex because they enjoy the happy-ending, but they also want to reach you on a more emotional level.<\/p>\n Unfortunately, not knowing this leaves many women feeling like they\u2019re being backed into a corner, so they Google things like \u201chow to make him commit\u201d out of confusion and desperation.<\/p>\n But there are a couple of ways to circumvent this issue.<\/p>\n It\u2019s important not to jump on the defense and assume a guy simply wants to get you into bed because he\u2019s after your body. That does happen, of course, but it\u2019s not always the case.<\/p>\n The problem with this dynamic is that it creates a dangerous dialogue.<\/p>\n The woman in this kind of scenario typically says something like,\u00a0\u201cOkay, you want sex from me and I want a commitment from you. I will give you my body and have sex with you if you give me safety and make a commitment to me.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n If the man agrees, all that\u2019s been created is an illusion of safety.<\/p>\n And some men do agree to become a woman\u2019s boyfriend in exchange for sex, even though they\u2019re not ready to be in a relationship with her. And some women do agree to have sex in exchange for a guy committing to being her boyfriend, even though they\u2019re not ready to have sex with him.<\/p>\n When this happens, it isn\u2019t fair to either party, and it\u2019s inauthentic on both ends.<\/p>\n If you want to avoid falling into this trap, you what you need to learn first is how to make him want you.<\/p>\n And the way to do that is by focusing on what it is that both of you want, and that\u2019s a meaningful connection.<\/p>\n Most men are looking for a long-term partner they have a meaningful connection with, but the only way they know how to do this is by having sex.<\/p>\n Women want to connect as well, but they believe they can only do that once they have a commitment.<\/p>\n When you reverse the dynamic and make connection the centerpiece of your relationship, you provide the foundation upon which a lasting relationship can be built.<\/p>\n If you\u2019re a woman who wants to learn how to make a man fall in love with you even if sex is currently off the table, this is what he needs to hear from you in order to keep him from running away.<\/p>\n Instead of saying, \u201cI don\u2019t sleep with men until I\u2019m in a committed relationship,\u201d say this:<\/p>\n \u201cI love the fact that you want me so much and I\u2019m really turned on by you, but I don\u2019t feel comfortable enough opening up to you yet. What I really want is to feel deeply connected to you before we take this next step.\u201d<\/p>\n These words challenge him to see that what really matters is the connection between the two of you.<\/p>\n They provide him with a pathway toward building intimacy with you. They help him to see that if he wants to get close to you in every possible way, he needs to make an investment in terms of his time and presence, and in terms of the manner in which he relates to and listens to you.<\/p>\n As he starts investing in you, you\u2019ll begin to feel a sense of true safety as the two of you connect and really get to know each other. You won\u2019t need a false sense of safety based on your demands for a commitment.<\/p>\n Remember that men and women are after the same thing: connection. They just go about it in different ways.<\/p>\n If you can work with your partner to put that connection before either the commitment or the sex, your relationship will have a far better chance of long-term success.<\/p>\n \u2013<\/p>\n Source: Beauty and Tips<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" When it comes to sex, men and women tend to view things differently. Women think about it, for sure, but men are more likely to obsess over it. As a woman wading through the world of dating and relationships, this difference often comes into play when you\u2019re trying to figure out now only how to […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":11261,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_exactmetrics_skip_tracking":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_active":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_note":"","_exactmetrics_sitenote_category":0,"iawp_total_views":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[39],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-11260","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-lifestyle"],"yoast_head":"\n